Just when I thought it was safe...
I walked out to my garden shed this morning to get on my bike to work and there it was...a sight I hadn't seen in maybe 2 months, a sight I was hoping I wouldn't see again...but there it was. Yep, a cat has used my gravel driveway as a toilet (I know it's a cat because it covered it up). This was a fairly recurrent problem I noticed soon after moving in to my apartment and I'd tried a few different remedies suggested to me - teabags soaked in vinegar, smelly grainy stuff you can buy from B&Q, orange peel, prayer...but all to no avail. It seemed quite strange that all of a sudden the cat(s)/dog(s) stopped frequenting my driveway but now it/they are back, unless it's just a one-off. Some people have suggested planting curry plants or some other plant called scat-a-cat (that's what it sounds like anyway, I've no clue) whose smell repels feline pooping apparently. A trip to a garden-centre is potentially called for. I'm just hoping that on this particular occasion the creature in question did not have a dose of the runs because that is never fun, but I'll have to wait until it dries up a bit for the clean-up operation. Oh the joys!

Not again!
My place doesn't have a great deal of storage space, so I tend to store a lot of stuff under my bed. I was rummaging around tonight looking for a particular file of uni stuff, when I opened a lever arch file only to discover...TEETH MARKS!!! It looks like I've got a housemate(s) and no it's not the first time. The cardboard on the inside of the file seems to have been gnawed at. I'm thinking that if I have company, they probably wandered in one day when I left the back door open to air the place. I'm rather freaked to be honest, I'm not particularly fond of little rodents taking up residence unannounced,unwanted and rent-free in my place. I've set a trap in the corner of my bedroom with some chocolate, surely that would be too hard to resist? And right now I'm seriously considering sleeping on the sofa. It's the uncertainty of these situations that's rather tricky. If the trap yields no results does that mean there was no mouse in the first place? Or do they have extraordinary willpower and the canniness to know all is not as it seems and avoid getting caught in the trap? If I do catch one, how many more are there? And where all have they been , do I need to douse the whole flat in bleach? ...Groan, there's never a dull moment!

Yesterday I met Elvis, or maybe it was his cousin, or nephew or something. He’s one of my neighbours and we met at a shareholders meeting of the property development I live in. He really has the look sussed – hair perfectly quiffed Elvis-style, sideburns, red shirt with dark jacket, gold watch, lots of bling – he was the man I tell you! His wife looked fairly normal actually. They were dead on to talk to, but how random is that? Maybe he’s an impersonator and does wedding parties etc.

Oh and I’m now a company director! I find this totally hilarious! The existing directors stepped down at the meeting and new directors had to be elected from the property owners within the development. It just entails basic bookkeeping for maintenance of the development. One of my neighbours volunteered first to do all the bookkeeping stuff, so I said I’d give her a hand as secretary. Don’t quite know what I was thinking, moment of madness obviously!

City Slicker
I am now a resident of Belfast! I got the keys of my new pad last Thursday and slept there for the first on Saturday night… and I’m loving it! It’s been quite a challenge to fit the contents of a 3-bedroomed semi-detached house into a 2-bedroomed apartment, but I’m getting there and gradually eliminating all the boxes. A few teething problems here and there with my PC, internet access etc, but hopefully I’ll get it sorted properly soon. It’s hard to believe that it was only 7 weeks ago today that I saw the apartment for the first time…and now it’s my home!

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The Family
Last week one of my brothers had a car accident – a guy drove out in front of him. Thankfully my bro was ok, just stiff and sore, but the car was a write-off. On the same day one of my cousin’s, her daughter had a car accident and then a couple of days later, one of my nephews who lives in Vancouver also had a car accident. Thankfully there were no injuries in these accidents either. But what the heck is going on with our family?! Part of me feels like we’re under attack. But then on the other hand God is showing his hand of protection over us which is awesome.

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Time for God to move
Well it looks like my job contract is going to be up at the end of the month. Things could change of course but that’s the lie of the land at the moment. I’m fairly calm about it, I guess the move has been a good distraction. But it’s very scary as my jobseeking to date has not been successful and there’s not a lot out there. I’m under a wee bit of pressure too with the Masters course I’ve been taking as I need to be involved in Youth & Community Work while I’m completing it.

I get a sense that it’s really time for God to move, time for a miracle! There’s part of me which is trying to trust in God, recognise how he works everything out for good for me, how he has plans for my future, how he will equip me to cope with whatever life throws at me. But then there’s another part of me which thinks of all the worst-case scenarios, questions all the decisions I’ve taken in the last year, doubts if God has something in store and whether he’ll come up with the goods or not. I have to remember that at the start of the year I thought I was going to be homeless (well not actually - I would have been living with my Mum & Dad) and now I've got a home - a real answer to prayer! I think I really need to be disciplined in taking time to listen to what God’s saying and doing around me, and if you could send up a prayer for me that would be great!

Heading East!
I am no longer a resident of Dungannon as of yesterday!! Unfortunately I can’t get the keys of the flat I’ve bought in Belfast until next week – a few legal glitches have delayed things so I guess I’m ‘homeless’ at the moment, but parents tend to come in handy for some things! I’m rather frustrated this weekend because I’m in a kind of ‘limbo land’ – everything is in boxes all over the place (most of my belongings are in a cattle-trailer!) and I’m just not good at living in chaos, I like my own space and doing my own thing (in others words I can be a bit of a selfish git, good job I’m single!). But to be honest I couldn’t have done without Mum & Dad this week – they came down on Wednesday & Thursday nights and helped me pack up everything. I’ve been rather stressed to say the least, and there have been a few tears along the way, but hey we’ve got the first stage over. Yesterday Dad was with me when I picked up the last few bits and pieces and dropped off the keys with the estate agent and as we were driving round the town on errands he commented how well I had gotten to know it. It’s true – in the last 5½ years or so I’ve definitely been able to get a good handle on the place. But it’s kind of weird because although I made some really great friends there and definitely plan to keep in touch (I promise I will!), I will not miss the town. I’ll miss Peatlands Park but that’s really it. And that’s kind of sad. In many ways I feel like I gave a lot during my time there but didn’t get a lot back. Maybe it’s not right to have that kind of attitude, maybe there’s some bitterness in there that God needs to sort out, but it’s just the way I feel. Now I should and want to focus on the future and possibilities that may be ahead.

It’s good to move on.

Oh...my...gosh!!! I'm moving on Friday! Aaarrggghhhh! Well actually it's all good - I'm looking forward to the move and the possibilities it holds (the main one being that I won't have to leave the house at the crack of dawn to get to work in time!). But flip me, things are all a bit mental at the minute, I don't quite know if I'm coming or going. I'm trying to pack everything up, but I'm a bit of a butterfly and start in one room, get distracted and start sorting out stuff in another room. I seem to have accumulated a serious amount of stuff and guff in the last 2 and a half years of being a homeowner in Dungannon - the local charity shop and my recycling bin have been benefiting! Hopefully I'll get all sorted over the weekend, emerge from underneath all the boxes and be back in contact with the (blog-) world. Peace.

All change
I really don’t know if I’m coming or going this week! On Monday morning I found out that I’ve got a job – woo-hoo!!!! I’m well chuffed – a relief after 7 weeks’ unemployment, & it’s definitely a bit of a God-thing. I start on Monday with the SEELB working as an Adolescent Liaison Officer in an alternative education unit in Bangor. I’m a bit nervous, but really looking forward to getting stuck in and working alongside the young people. Not looking forward to the daily commute, although I’ll stay with my parents a bit to cut down the mileage slightly.

Got the chance to pray with a good friend the other day and it was cool because she felt God saying that he wants to reach out to the young people I’ll be working with through me, and I’m like, wow! For the past wee while I’ve kind of been wondering what God’s thoughts are on my gameplan to pursue youthwork, move house etc. And I haven’t exactly had any visions to state a particular calling or anything. But praying on Wednesday I just realised the work I’ll be doing in Bangor is exactly where my heart is, it is what I’m called to. This time last year I thought I’d never find a sense of calling again or be able to discover my heart. But I realised afresh this week that as God has renewed my heart for him in the valley of the past year, he has renewed my heart to reach out to young people. It’s so cool! I’m really excited about what God is doing in me, and to have reached this point.

And what’s more…I’ve put my house up for sale! I’m looking to move probably to the Belfast area, we’ll see what works out, house prices are nuts. So this week I’ve been working flat this week out to get my house ship-shape and presentable for viewings. It’s kind of ironic – the place is beginning to look more like a proper home just when I’m about to leave, I’m only getting round to putting up lampshades and pictures now! But I’m looking forward to the move, it’s just all the logistics that will make life rather complex over the next couple of months. But then God has got me this far and I know he’s faithful.

What's been happenin'...
Well it would seem I haven’t been very ‘purpose-driven’ recently considering my lack of blogging over the past week or so. Actually I’ve been somewhat absorbed by other things…namely planning a month-long trip to China in 8 weeks’ time! Woo-hoo! I’m going with a friend and we’re hoping to spend some time in Yunnan, Sichuan and then Thailand or Vietnam, doing a spot of trekking etc. If you saw any of Michael Palin’s ‘Himalaya’ programme last year, some of the places on our itinerary were featured on it e.g. Tiger Leaping Gorge. I cannot wait! Unfortunately I can’t get unpaid leave so when I come back mid-September I’ll be jobless. But to be honest I’m not too worried – it will work out and God will keep me right.

So I’m trying to get fit and have been trying to bike to work most days and do some extra biking round the local country roads in the afternoons/evenings, wish the weather would settle though, I hate biking in wind and rain! Actually I fell off last week, felt like a right prat so hopped right back on to try and salvage some credibility. When I got home I had to turf my trainers into the washing machine as they were rather spattered with blood, and had to go to my next-door neighbour to ask for some antiseptic. It’s sad but I feel quite proud of my ‘war-wound’ – makes me feel like a ‘proper cyclist’ (though believe me if you saw the cut of me you’d know I’m far from that, I barely know how to use the gears!).

Eason’s is going good, still enjoying it and it is still so blissful to be working part-time and have time for other things during the day, such as watching a spot of tennis now that there’s actually some on terrestrial TV (bring on Wimbles, yay!). At work I’ve had the dubious pleasure of sorting out the Mills & Boon books and the titles really take the biscuit! It seems that if you’re a male doctor, cowboy, sheikh, Greek tycoon or even banker, you have instant sex appeal. I think my ‘favourite’ titles are: ‘Lover Undercover’, ‘The Last Man in Texas’, ‘Expecting the Cop’s Baby’ and ‘Crime and Passion’…NOT!

Was at the Third Day concert last week, along with what seemed like the rest of Northern Ireland’s Christian community – it’s rather weird the way you constantly bump into folk you know, bit like a mini Summer Madness. Personally I find it a bit claustrophobic. Anyway it was a really great show. And I was at my first ever cosmetics party the week before that courtesy of Virgin Vie and an old school pal. Quite an experience, thought I’d be a bit intimidated considering I’m really not into the whole make-up scene and can barely put mascara on without poking my eye out. But actually it was a good laugh, the group was like a pack of wee kiddies let loose in a sweetie shop (that's ‘candy store’ for all you N American people!). Yesterday’s latest adventure was that I came home to find a bird in my house, yes that’s right, a flippin’ bird! It must have come down the chimney as there was soot all round the fireplace. The funny thing is that the fireguard is still in place so it must have managed to squeeze out without knocking over the fireguard or any of my candles! When I walked into the house it was flapping about in my bedroom desperately trying to get out, poor thing. So had to get a couple of plastic bags over my hands, try to cup it and force it (gently!) out a window. Unfortunately there’s bird poop round quite a few of my windows, it’s been fun cleaning that up!

So there you go that’s the latest score on the doors with me – I’m enjoying life!

Paintwork
Yesterday I was painting my spare room. The previous occupant seemed to have a thing about playing with a nail-gun in their spare time, I used up nearly a whole tube of polyfilla filling up all the holes! But I’ve got my first coat completed so that’s progress.

Had a really freaky happening the other night. Recently I got new internal doors which need painting with undercoat then gloss. So I was getting stuck into some painting the other night using two brushes, one big, one small. First of all I started painting the edges with the small brush and in the middle of that I had a phonecall. But then (da da daaaa!) when I was ready to start painting with the bigger brush, I couldn’t find it!…And I still can’t! It’s totally bizarre! It’s either going to turn up in some really random place or else it’s going to remain one of those unsolved mysteries. At the time I actually told satan to get lost seeing as he’s a loser and started blasting some worship music while I painted! Unfortunately with the smaller brush it’s takes half an hour extra to do the painting, but I’m reliably informed that it gives a smoother finish!

Mouse Update
The mouse in my house turned out to be a lone operator – good job too! However I dreamt last night that there was a rat in my house, although for some reason it was a cross between a rat and a beaver (?!?), whatever it was it qualified as a rodent so my dream had a somewhat nightmarish quality to it!

Just give me Jesus!
Life has been pretty stressful recently mainly because I’ve been letting things get on top of me and generally I’ve just been failing miserably in the spiritual health department. I’ll warn everyone now…for the next 2 years you’re going to hear me moan about my Masters course and how I’ve got so much work to do! So anyway there’s been a distinct lack of blogs as thon Martin boy keeps reminding me!

This past week I feel like God’s been pulling me up short and asking, “So, do you love me?” And I’ve basically been wanting to pull my hoodie over my head and find something interesting in the carpet. Today at church the sermon was based on Jeremiah 2 where God is asking Israel why they have rejected him when he has been so good to them. In verse 5 He asks, “What fault did your fathers find in me, that they strayed so far from me?” It struck me, how on earth can we ever turn our backs on God? It really is ludicrous the way we battle so much to go our own way when all we need is in God. Sometimes we let God get so small and forget just how great he is, how nothing is too big for him to handle. A while ago I came across this quote: "We are able to have as much of God as we want. Christ puts the key to His treasure chest in our hands and invites us to take all we desire. If someone is allowed into a bank vault, told to help himself to the money, and leaves without one cent, whose fault is it if he remains poor? And whose fault is it that Christians usually have some meagre portions of the free riches of God?" (Quoted from a book called “God Whispers” published by Relevant.) It’s so true, surely if I went out on a limb to trust my God, I would discover that he would indeed supply. Why settle for second-best when God’s best is readily available to us?

I also read this the other day & it brought some comfort: “Christianity is the only religion where you don’t have to clean yourself up before you can be saved and healed. Jesus’ love for His sons and daughters is enough to win our hearts back from all the struggles we’re bound to.” (Derek Webb, one of the Caedmon’s Call crew, writing in Relevant magazine.) Amen!

The latest…
I’ve kind of disappeared from blogland for a wee while owing to having the flu for 2 weeks, moving house in the middle of having the flu, trying to do work stuff and having just started a masters course in Community Education! Can life get more stressful? …well I think it probably can, but I never want to go through all this ever again! And I never want to marry a Methodist minister!

Information overload!
Oh my word! I’m currently in Leicester for the start of the MA which I’m doing via distance-learning. My head is about to explode. Yesterday we were doing stuff on anti-oppressive practice which I’d never heard of before until I found out about the course. It’s basically the idea that as community educators we’re working towards social justice, equality of opportunity etc and that we’re seeking to empower the people with whom we work so that they are free from oppression and discrimination. Yesterday morning we had a major discussion on “can blacks be racist?” which was fascinating! The main issue came down to our definition of racism and the ideas of those in the classroom varied quite a lot! For many racism = prejudice + power, which was a totally new concept for me, I just felt it was rooted in basic prejudice. So our tutor felt that blacks couldn’t be racist based on the fact that blacks are not in a position of power in today’s world which produced heavy discussion. Another of the tutors on Wednesday had been telling us about how he would have days of study where his head would hurt so much from thinking and we were looking at him wondering which planet he came from, but actually after yesterday morning I could really identify with what he was saying!

Anyway I’m really enjoying it all: the crack is good with the other students, met some really great people (4 of us originate from Norn Iron, but I’m the only one actually living there), there’s a real breadth of experience and people are involved in a variety of types of community development/youthwork etc, it’s nice having evenings off to go for a drink, grab food together (though sore on the pocket!), and there are quite a few Christians on the course, but it’s really exhausting and the workload is pretty scary. Basically I’m going to become a hermit for the next 2 years! But hey, it’ll be worth it!

Housemates
I finally got moved into my house last week, slept in the house for the first last Thursday night – quite a bizarre experience in itself given that it’s absolute chaos – all my stuff is more or less in one of the bedrooms, which will ultimately become the spare bedroom, in loads of boxes and I hadn’t quite got round to getting a duvet so I’ve been sleeping in my sleeping bag – I feel like a squatter or something! Anyway last Friday evening I was hunting for something…again (I lost 2 pillowcases for a whole week but recovered them last Saturday!), when in one of my boxes I found the remains of one of my chocolate bars and the realisation struck…MOUSE in the house!!!!!!!! I nearly flipped my lid, I really did, I thought I was going to lose it! So I was out with the anti-bacterial handwash (didn’t have any dettol!) cleaning things in the box. Please note this box was situated in the room I was sleeping in and had been there for a week! So anyway later on I bought a mousetrap, a friend came round and set it & 2 others for me with galaxy chocolate and then I spent the rest of the evening downstairs waiting for my furry friend(s) to come out and play. 10.30pm and I hear a big “Snap!” It took me 5 minutes to actually psych myself up to go upstairs and check the trap, in fact I crept up with a saucepan in my hand (what the heck is a mouse going to do to me anyway? What a wuss!) There in the trap was the mouse, almost decapitated! I did a version of Riverdance on the spot then ran downstairs to figure out a way of removing it. This took a further 10 minutes, with some more riverdancing in the kitchen because I really had the heebie-jeebies. So I got on a pair of rubber gloves (having just bought them that evening!), grabbed a cardboard box and took my courage in both hands (I have to admit I did think of ringing a friend to do it for me, but then told myself to wise up, now that I own a house, I need to be a big girl!) and went up the stairs again. I managed to grab the mousetrap complete with dead mouse, fling it into the box, then run down the stairs, out the house and threw the whole lot in the bin! Then I rang my sister to tell her of my victory (I just had to share it with someone!) and then drove round to my old housemate’s house to sleep there for the night! That’s one way to spend your first weekend in your new home! I don’t think there are anymore mice as the other traps haven’t been disturbed (although who knows what I’ll find when I get back from Leicester!) so hopefully I can sleep in peace.

Anyway life is definitely not dull these days!

Excitement for the oncoming week!
I get the keys of my house on Monday – woo-hoo!
Yes! I’m a homeowner!!!
No! I have bills to pay!!!

Random stuff…
Catalogue came through the post the other day for random kitchen stuff. Seeing as I moving house next week (yee-hah!!!) thought I’d flick through. Random is right! You can buy a set of spoons which are designed specifically to eat spaghetti easily – there’s a wee slot in the centre of the spoon for the fork to go to that you can wind the spaghetti round the fork easily and it doesn’t slip off. Where has the fun in eating spaghetti gone? What would the Italians say? Shocking!


Football fever
The big final is tomorrow - Armagh vs Tyrone, GAA football. Everywhere you go there are red & white flags hanging from houses, cars, streetlights etc. You can buy a Bart Simpson wearing a Tyrone strip to stick in the window of your car. I was out with a group of friends last night & one was relating how she’d seen a cow painted red in a field near the Tamnamore roundabout (at the M1). Then another was saying how one of her patients had been late for her physio appointment because her husband was spray-painting a cow red!

Give us this day our daily bread
Been thinking about this line an awful lot recently. Actually ever since I heard a sermon on it in August. It just really struck me. I’ve always limited that prayer to asking God for the basic essentials in life. But recently I’ve just realised that it’s so much more than that – it’s an asking prayer, but yet it requires trust on our part for God to deliver. These days I’m in a bit of a flat spin, everything has been changing – Johnboy Johnston leaving DYFC, Leanne joining the DYFC team (DV she arrives in NI this week – yee-hah!), buying a house (the saga continues, I NEVER want to go through this again! I get the keys at the end of the month DV, although it was supposed to be last week…don’t get me started!!!), starting a Masters course mid-October – it’s manic! And us humans just don’t like change… which is exactly why we have to ask for our daily bread – we have to ask for what we need for the day ahead…every day. I’m a bit random in my prayers so I really could do with learning from this. Maybe if I prayed for God’s grace to cover me each day then I wouldn’t mess up so bad as I sometimes do. And each day is only meant to be taken one day at a time. I need to trust that God will help me get through today, and not worry about tomorrow, because his cup of grace will be full then too, it won’t run out. God’s love is new each day, if I truly took that on board afresh every morning how differently would I live each day?

What I learned yesterday on a wee shopping trip:
- Irons with a stainless steel base iron far better than other irons because they glide over the clothes better. Needless to say, they are far more expensive & I decided to go for the cheap option!
- "Rinse hold" is where you can make your washing machine leave your clothes in the water so that if you're out all day and don't get the chance to take out your laundry as soons as the cycle is finished, the clothes won't crease. Amazing!
You learn something new every day!

Snapshots in time
It’s amazing what can happen in one week, here’s a few snapshots from the last week or so:

Saturday 19th, 4pm – I’ve just had the week off but I still feel wrecked, I’m dreading the forthcoming kids club, there’s a heaviness in my heart and soul because I don’t know where exactly I am with God; I spend an hour staring into space, numb.
Sunday 20th, 7pm – heading to church, turning right at a set of lights, from my right comes a Ford Fiesta that went through the red light and hits me side-on – all damage to the driver door. I could see him coming but couldn’t do anything about it. God is provident – he sends an angel: a friend of my housemate’s who happened to be right behind me, he calms me down and holds my hand, staying with me till the police come and I get home. Paddy the Peugeot (ok statistically those who name their cars are more likely to take better care of them than those who don’t’ name their cars!) was borderline case for being wrote-off, I’m just left with a creak in my neck and a sore back, but I am thankful. And two friends call round as soon as they hear to make sure I’m okay and keep me company. I am blessed.
Tuesday 22nd, 8pm – I agree the purchase of a house, a private sale, no estate agent involved (hee hee!). I’ve been trying to buy for more than a year now and this is one of the many houses I’ve had my eye on. It’s not over till the fat lady sings – the bubbly won’t come out until the keys are in my hands, but the prospects are good. The owners are parents of young people I work with and they are simply happy for me to get their house!
Tuesday 22nd, 9pm – my housemate gets a phonecall hearing that a close friend’s brother committed suicide, he was doing missions work overseas, another brother had been killed in a tragic accident overseas some years ago.
Wednesday 23rd, 1.30pm – I’m bombing up the M1 trying to get to Belfast on time, having to force myself to take deeper breaths to try and stop my mind racing over all the demands of work and life and to-do lists. I wonder if I’ll ever learn the discipline of being still before God, truly still, taking time to hear what he has to say, or will my mind always race, trying to second-guess my/His move?
Wednesday 23rd, 3.45pm – I bump into a good friend I haven’t seen in ages, it’s so good to see her again, and have a giggle together!
Thursday 24th, 11am – it’s chaos in the kids club I’m helping out with – kids are badgering me to help them with their badge-making and do that “funky writing” (if my art teacher could see me now!!!), paper, pens, scissors are flying randomly through the air, there’s lots of giggles and laughs with plenty of interaction between kids and leaders…then I suddenly realise I’m absolutely loving it all and I love those kids.
Thursday 24th, 3pm – I share a time of chatting about work issues, the future, faith issues and personal issues with a good friend and colleague. As we often do, we pray together, a precious time together, these times together have taught me what true fellowship is about and the value of the ministry of presence.
Friday 25th, 9pm – I share a meal with good friends, we plan to watch a DVD, but don’t quite get round to it as the craic is 90, and there’s plenty of deep discussion about life & faith…it’s another blessed communion of souls.
Sunday 27th, 10am – I hear of the death of my aunt after having battled for many years with rheumatoid arthritis and struggling more recently with a weakening heart and kidneys going into failure.

Life is definitely FULL!
What are the lessons to pull from this?
1. In all of these things, God is greater…God is GREATER! Got to hold on to that truth.
2. There’s a bigger picture. Winn Collier in this month’s Relevant magazine comments on how David, on hearing of the death of Saul, wept despite the fact that Saul had been “hell-bent on his destruction”. “For David, the death of Saul was about something far bigger than him. The real drama was not centred on the conflict between a shepherd and a king; their recent tussles were only a sub-plot to a far larger story: God…In God’s story, the purposes of monarchs and rebels and mothers and nations was singular in purpose: the glory of a great God.” I wonder to myself, what is God doing around me? What’s he up to? This week has been a very unexpected sort of week, but I’m left intrigued and even a bit excited in a strange sort of way, what’s God going to do next? Where will he reveal himself? Where will his glory be shown? Let the Kingdom COME!