Longing for something more

(Warning, this might be a bit on the long side, but hey, it’s not often I get deep and philosophical on this blog so make the most of it!)

For the last number of years Christmas time has been a time when I’ve taken the ‘Bah humbug’ attitude. I get fed up with the commercialism & materialism, the rushing around, the pressure for it to be a ‘special’ time of year etc and I guess my strategy has been all about survival.

Psychologically it’s a time when we are all winding down – finally getting round to doing the filing we’ve been putting off for several months, getting bits and bobs tidied up at work so that when we go back in the New Year everything feels fresh and you can make a clean start.

Mark reflected a wee while back on how we seem to be so desperate for something that the Christmas anticipation starts ages back in October but he also makes the point that reaching the end of the year in itself is significant. And the reality is that everyone is dropping like flies with illness because we’re tired out and ready for a break and we’re all just hanging on by the skin of our teeth to get to the holidays to get switched off. (Unless you’re in retail of course and man I take my hat off to you, I couldn’t work the hours you guys work at this time of year!) Our body clocks seem to be tuned in to the calendar year and we’re glad for the chance to let it all hang out for a bit and get our batteries recharged so that we can get stuck into a New Year.

Mark’s post made me think though – if I’m honest I think I try to ignore Christmas because I’m disappointed that the magic isn’t real – presents won’t magically appear in my living room, fairies won’t flit about and do my dishes à la Disney's Sleeping Beauty, and the all-important snow only shows up in this part of the world once in a blue moon (and even when it does it tends to turn to grey slush fairly quickly). I think I’m maybe longing for something more…

Last week at the PCI Church House Carol Service, one of the staff who is originally from Zimbabwe and has been living here for 4 years shared with us an email from some friends about what Christmas in Zimbabwe is like now. Zimbabwe has changed dramatically in the last few years, beyond recognition for my colleague if he was to go back. For the shops which are open there is hardly anything on the shelves, people are desperately trying to eke out a living. Christmas is Jesus because that’s pretty much all they have. They don’t know what’s going on, they don’t understand what God is doing, but they know and trust that God is at work. All they have is Christ and Christmas heralds the time of Emmanuel – God with us.

Hearing about Christmas from this totally different standpoint has helped me get things into perspective a little more. It’s nothing new that I’m longing for something more, it’s indicative of that inbuilt ‘God-shaped hole’. So I guess I want to make a conscious effort to be a blessing to the people around me this Christmas, it’s NOT about me or what I can get out of it. Though I know that I’ll fail miserably in places because I mess up, I’m wayward and I don’t like not getting my own way. But the something more has come into the world, something magical has happened and is happening.

So maybe it’s down to trust, and choice – I choose to believe in God’s goodness and justice and righteousness, I choose to follow him and walk in His ways, I choose to believe that good wins the day. This year, Christmas represents hope for me. Hope for the future. The world is a bleak place - I’ve just started reading Blood River and I’m being made aware afresh of the travesties which have occurred down through the centuries, what humans have done to humans and what humans still do to humans is truly horrendous – Lord have mercy on us! But there is hope, hope that we are not abandoned or left carry on in this quagmire by ourselves, but God is with us in the midst and depths of our grief and pain and loss. A new day is coming… This Christmas I will remember that God is with me and I get to be part of He’s doing in the world… and that is truly magical and wonderful.

David Stevens also provides a good thought for the season here.