Captivated?
Way back in the springtime I read a book which I meant to blog about at the time as it has attracted a wee bit of controversy, so finally, here’s my pennysworth! The book is Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul by Stasi & John Eldredge which I guess serves as a companion to John Eldredge’s Wild at Heart: Discovering the Secret of a Man’s Soul. I guess the main idea is that as Christian women we should see ourselves as captivating. But I’m afraid I was not totally captivated by this book. I’ve spoken to friends who gave up after the first few chapters, one even said that it was the first book she’d ever thrown across the room! I stuck with it, there must be a stubborn thing in me and to be fair I rewarded with finding some really great teaching. In particular I really enjoyed the stuff exploring Adam & Eve in Genesis and the fact that Eve was described as being ‘ezer kenegdo’ i.e. ‘desperately needed’. The Alternative translation of the Bible puts God’s decision to make a companion for Adam like this, “I shall make a sustainer beside him”, and I find that very helpful because it emphasises the way men and women are made to complement one another and that women are not secondary to men. However I did not appreciate being told that a woman’s central question is, “Am I lovely?” That might be a question that is important to some women but I don’t believe it’s a central one, I think that for men and women alike the question is more like, “Am I accepted/acceptable?” This was followed up with stuff about little girls wanting to be princesses and liking horses and apparently as little girls we “go through a season when [we] will not wear anything if it does not twirl”. Now if you know me at all, you’ll know that to say I’m a tomboy is an understatement! I do not feel that this detracts from my femininity, I am more comfortable expressing my feminine nature in other ways – surely it’s not just about princesses, horses and twirly dresses! I guess that’s just my take on this book, I believe that for some it’s been very helpful and that’s great, I’m happy for them. If you want to read more there’s an interesting article on the Sophia network exploring the trend of Christian writing on the differences between the sexes.